Off topic: The Human Centipede 2

One word: dark. I just started watching this movie yesterday and for someone who enjoys the occasional horror film, it was already a little much. For those of you that have seen The Human Centipede and thought it was too much, I wouldn't suggest watching no. 2.

Here's a quick synopsis of the first one (don't worry, no spoilers):

This crazy German scientist attaches these three dogs together in true centipede fashion. The dogs die because he's an idiot and believes they can survive on each others feces. He cooks up this brilliant plan to abduct three people and do the same thing. Madness ensues. The movie has some pretty cool scenes and is filmed very well. The acting is great and most things make sense.

As for the second one...

The main character is a short, obese British man who was sexually abused as a child. He's clearly mentally ill and develops a love affair with THC (yes, the movie is about him loving THC and wanting to create his own). He works in an underground parking garage and clubs people unconscious with a crowbar and then takes them back to this warehouse. The strange thing is that everyone he abducts is super shitty and almost deserves it. He also uses duct tape to tie everyone up and no one (there's like 10 people) can break it.

Basically, this movie tries way too hard and it's not really even enjoyable to watch. But, judge for yourself:

Off topic: Matt Williams, you were right.

I'm a big enough man to admit when I'm wrong.

Last night Matt and I were having a civilized discussion about who knew John C. Reilly better. I casually threw it in Matt's face that he hadn't seen Step Brothers and he politely mentioned that if I hadn't seen Dr. Steve Brule, I shouldn't be speaking.

After more beer and delightful, quiet discussion, my gorgeous girlfriend and I departed from Carlos and Murphy's.

We arrived at home and enjoyed some comedy from Steve Carell and the gang from The Office.

I awoke to find a text from Matthew on my phone (or in it, if you think about it).

"Dr. Steve Brule.. youtube"

Short, to the point. I looked it up. Hilarious. Don't believe me? When have I lied to you? Shut up.






You were right Matt, cheers buddy.

Just bought MW3!

... and it's very similar to Modern Warfare 2. The graphics aren't much better, a lot of killstreaks are still the same, a lot of perks are still the same (although they've been given fancier names) and they still thought giving machine pistols the "akimbo" (dual wield) upgrade was a good idea. One of my main beefs with this game is the akimbo upgrade. It takes very little skill to run around and spray bullets everywhere like a six year old. Someone told me they plan to remove that upgrade in the next patch, I hope that's true.

I could go on and on about what I think about Modern Warfare 3, but I think it can all be summed up in one sentence: They found a style that worked, and ran with it.

Kids love it because it's simple, and adults love it because they can play against kids and feel better about themselves.

I'm the exception, of course.





After I watched this video, I realized it seems like an ad for the US Army. Not my intention, sorry.

Off topic: Back from British Columbia!

Every year the army engineers have an exercise in Chilliwack, B.C, from 26 Dec to 31 Dec. And every year, I find some way to get out of it. In 2009, I was on leave from OP PODIUM (security at the winter games) and last year I had surgery on my foot. This year, however, I am but a poor student.

Though at an inopportune time, it was still enjoyable. Roughly 35 soldiers from my unit made it out and we worked closely together. We spent day one building a medium girder bridge (MGB, the army loves acronyms).

The second day, we worked on MR (medium raft). MR is basically a bunch of sections of a floating bridge/transport raft that can be used to either move vehicles (tanks included) across large bodies of water or to construct a hasty bridge.

The third day was building the ACROW bridge, which is a huge pain in the ass. The pieces are very heavy and awkward to carry. Every spot where the pieces are easy to left, is somewhere you'll crush your fingers when you go to place it. The first group that went through the ACROW station didn't have the proper carrying bars, luckily they were there by the time we got there.

My favorite part was when I got to pull the MGB back over the gap to be disassembled. It was pretty badass.

And finally, here's a shot of the MR transporting  some vehicles.

It rained a lot, the wind was brutal, but the temperature was around +10 c everyday. The sun shone for about 10 minutes the last day we were there. All in all, wicked training.

Off topic: Tales from the Cryptkeeper!

Anyone else remember that show? I was talking with my girlfriend about this the other day and she said she didn't remember it. I had one question: How do you grow up in North America and NOT know about Tales from the Cryptkeeper?! That's assuming you were still awesome enough to be watching cartoons in 1993.

I used to get so excited when it would be on TV. My sister HATED, my brother was impartial, but I loved that show. That may explain why I love watching horror movies today. I'm not saying TFTC was horrifying, but I think when your a kid, some episodes may have been like watching SAW. I remember every Halloween, 'Gremlins' would air on some indiscernible Halloween themed TV station. I'd watch it every year while my siblings whined and left the room, and if they were foolish enough to watch it with me, they would enjoy several sleepless nights courtesy of moi, producing various Gremlin sounds.

 Scary movies are awesome. A lot of people hate being scared and refuse to ever go see a horror flick (I'm dating one of these people). I think horror fans need to start applying some pressure. Sometimes it's fun to be a little scared!

Here's some good movies to start with:

Gremlins

Child's Play

The Exorcist (Original)

If your new to horror films, I'd start at the top and work your way down. The Exorcist was made in 1973 and it's still one of the scariest movies I've ever seen.

Oh yeah:



If you don't recognize that theme music, you may be from Mars. Or old. Which are both just great!

Off topic: Between Two Ferns

I can`t think of a funnier internet series than Between Two Ferns. It`s basically just Zach Galifianakis mock-interviewing celebrities, but it`s hilarious in it`s simplicity. Zack takes abrasive, deadpan, insulting style of comedy really works well. It seems whenever I  get bored, I always load up a Between Two Ferns episode.





From Wikipedia:

`` His interview style consists of typical interview questions, bizarre non sequiturs and sometimes inappropriate sexual questions and comments. ``

Here`s a few of my favorites:

http://youtu.be/hYgZfMX2KTo  - Ben Stiller


http://youtu.be/z_MvHyAZ7xE  - Conan O`Brien

http://youtu.be/sCF-mCeW7Ig  - Jennifer Aniston and Tia Tequila

Sorry, won`t let me embed.